complaints from ex-landlord

supposed message from our ex-landlord in UCU Campus...sorry Marilinda(and to all those who believed it)!!!

Dear ex-tenants,
pls. receive my wishes for the New Year and I wish you health and success inyour academic/professional life.
It's true that after you left things have been improving here promptly, sinceyou were the first tenants to live in these flats. Newcomers are more quiet and more easy going without great demands such as fast internet 24h/7 and the terrace key for wild parties.
Just after most of you left there are some things we haven't settled yet and weneed your help to solve them.
Pls. take some time to answer any of thequestions concerns you.
1) In one of the bathrooms we found a forgotten bike. Do u have any idea whobelongs it?
2) Who was from the floor that has downloaded 10!! DVDs of Yoga Pilates? He/Shealmost to destroy our Internet server.
3) Another student from another building reported us that he was in a party andhe got poisoned from some dogfood or catfood!? The party was in your floor. Didanyone had a pet in the apartments? And why someone offered dogfood?
4) There has been a female tenant that had completed 3-4 complaints against aColombian guy living in the block and coming to the 4th floor intentionally tomake noise. Did anyone ahd a Colombian friend that was visiting him frequentlyand if yes what is the name of this Colombian guy?
5) We heard that one of the tenants had a key that could open all the doors. Whyhe didn't report it and how he found out? Luckily nothing was stolen but it'sinapprropiate to open doors for fun.
6) There is one room that still smells - after 3 cleanings - from heavy andchily spices. Any idea how did this happened?
7) Many tenants complained about the frequent Karaoke contests you wereperforming. They complained because they couldn't join and they couldn'tdistuinguish the music because of the very loud voices.
8) Two rooms from the left side have a lot of minor damages while one of them was missing practically all the lambs. How did this happened?
9) There were 2 bottles and one glass found on the roof of the terrace. Iremember there were 2 asian people that had asked me the keys for a party. What happened?
I would like to have an answer to this questions as soon as possible pls.
Thanks in advance
Landlord UCU

ps. as u probably realised u are all in UCU's black list..
ps2. pls. answer in my private e-mail, because i will be some days off. use :Yannis_pil@yahoo.gr
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OF YOU!!!